Something Awesome

Way, way back in October I went to Gifu to visit a certain someone down in Gifu city. Gifu is famous for 鵜飼 (ukai), cormorant fishing.

Ukai in Gifu has a 1,000 year history, and the techniques are kept much the same as they were back in the day. It takes place at night in the summer and early fall. Lit only by balls of burning pine and sap, two fishermen steer the boat and handle trained cormorants as the birds chase after Ayu, a small sweet fish. The cormorants wear a leash around their necks that allows them to swallow small fish, but not large ones--the fisherman then takes the fish from the cormorant's mouth and tosses it back into the water. It sounds awful for the cormorants, but they're taken care of and live much longer than their wild brethren.

The first catch of the season goes to the Emperor Akihito and his family. The fishermen are living national treasures, their instruments (including the birds!) are national artifacts, and the river is a protected site.

And now, the awesome: video of the ukai!

Erin and I were the only foreigners on our observation boat. Our shipmates were super nice and wanted to know everything we thought of it.

Essays

I've been taking a more active role in lesson planning these past few months, which is part of why you haven't heard much from me. My units thus far have included giving public transit directions, and a cooking unit (make a cooking show in English!) for first years and the basics of logical single paragraph essays for second years. Making my students write feels like a cop out sometimes, but then wonderful mistakes like " one hurf of cabbage" and "fry the ham in a flying pargh" reminds me that it's worth it.

I've been grading said essays (and some written answers on other teacher's exams and homework--I volunteered) and have stumbled upon many gems.

So here it is, your November midterm treasury of quotes. English is full of comedic opportunity.

On Japanese food:

"I owe what I am today to Japanese agriculture."

"onigiri is Japanese soul food"

On cooking (and classical music):

"Wait for five minuets."

"Borb the pasta"

And, finally, on cultural misperceptions:

"I want to tell the truth to (foreign) students. The truth is that actually, there is no samurai or ninja in Japan now. I think that not so few foreigners believe in samurai or ninja. Therefore, they should know the truth. So if they come to Japan, they will not be disappointed."

I love how this kid isn't telling you the truth about samurai and ninja in Japan to end offensive stereotypes--he's telling you so you won't be disappointed.

That's all for now!

Well shoot

So. Been a while.

Massive photo update coming. Beware!

Halloween Stories part 2

And here are the funny stories. The students are finishing a story about taking shelter in an abandoned house on a dark and stormy Halloween night...

They sat and ate their chocolate. Then they heard, "please give me it!" They looked around. But there was nobody. They were so suprised, they shouted and ran away. "Wait, wait!" Someone said. They stopped and someone noticed the man who had spoken. He was their teacher. (by A)

We heard a noise and the lights went out. All of us thought something was behind us. We were too afraid to run. Our hearts began to beat faster, like something was about to happen to us. We tried to go out of the house but the door wouldn't open. Why? Because we pushed the door but the door was a pull door. (by T)

I noticed the doorbell ringing. We were surprised, and we got to be happy because we thought someone familiar had come here to help us. But we remembered we had done a shortcut, so our family can't find us. I watched out from the door...there was a tall man with a knife with blood. I was so frightened that I couldn't move. He said something, but I couldn't hear it because of heavy rain. The sound of tapping became stronger and stronger. At last, the door was broken. There was my brother. He said, "it is a surprise!! Hahaha." I couldn't help punching his face. (by R)

Halloween Stories part 1

My first years' assignment is to write a scary story. I give them the first half--they and some friends are out late trick-or-treating and take a short cut through the woods, but need to take shelter from the rain in an abandoned house--and they finish it.

Here are the best of the scary stories.

I heard a noise. But my friends didn't hear a noise. I heard a noise again at midnight. I looked back. A young girl was standing behind me. She said, "trick or treat, please give me some chocolates!" I was very surprised. I went out of the old house alone. The forest was dark. I didn't hear some noise. A long time, I was walking. I could get to my home. I was very happy.
I don't know who the young girl is. I want to forget this happening. But I remember her voice and her words every year. ( by K)

When we finished a cholocate bar, we heard footsteps. I wanted to escape out of the house, but we couldn't reach the door. The footsteps came near us, so we hid under the bed. Then, a man came into the room. He looked around the room and stared at the bed. When he lifted up the bed, I thought we would die. But he ran away out of the house! We thought why he ran away. My friend had a cross. The man is a vampire. After that, it stopped raining and the sun rose. We got home and told our parents. But everyone said there was no house on the hill. What was the house? (by Y)

I saw a light. My friend said, "someone is here! we can ask him how to get to our town!" My friends looked very happy. But my heart began to beat faster. The thing we thought was a person was a Jack'o'Lantern! It was moving alone and it said to us, "why are you here? you mustn't be here!" He looked very angry. We were too afraid to run and we hid under the bed. Then, we heard someone's voice. It said, "don't be here, don't be here..." The voice became louder and louder. We ran and hid again. For a while, we went out of the house. Then, the thunder fell on the house. The house broke. We looked around and one of my friends found her way home. Her house was near the old house. I found a light from the broken house. I said to it, "thank you very much." The light looked happy. (by C)

quothe the sensei, "hm, no, not quite right"

Most of you are probably familiar with Engrish, the art of inadvertantly funny English signs and slogans seen across Asia and the world. While not ad campaign masters themselves (yet, anyway), my students have made some of their own contributions through their written assignments and verbal answers.

It's high time to share some with you.

1. A very bad weekend

One of my classes did a scavenger hunt/ quiz rally as a final activity in the directions unit. Some groups finished way faster than others, and I wanted to keep them from being bored. So, I asked them to ask each other about their weekends in English and write down something interesting another student did, and then show it to me. They started talking while I finished off the game, and at the end of class, one girl brought her mini-report back to me. It read:

What did you do this weekend?

I was confiscated my cell phone by my English teacher.

I caught a cold.

This put me in the awkward position of laughing and trying to look sympathetic at the same time.

2. Animal, vegetable, mineral, or abstract concept?

After another class finished early with the scavenger hunt, the teacher and I decided to have them play a vocab game. There's a Japanese game called shiritori, where you have a category of words and go around in a circle saying words from that category; however, you must use the last character in that word to start your next word. I had the students play this game in English.

One student surprised me with gnu. However, a few students down, someone had to think of an animal that began with "A." Most people would have said ant, antelope, or ape. This student was thinking outside the box. Far outside the box.

He answered, very cheerfully, "AN ANGEL!"

I let it slide.

3. The most difficult thing

For a grammar class, the students read an article in English about the Chilean miners who are still trapped underground. After reading the article, the students were to write a short answer essay about how they would deal with being trapped underground for a month.

Generally, the compositions went like this one:

If I were trapped underground, there would be no day and night and no entertainments. I would soon lose my joy for life. But after a while, I would get used to it.

However, one pragmatist added a little something:

The most difficult thing would be to defecate.

I was looking them over for a teacher, who was standing right there when I was trying desperately not to laugh. She saw my face and then read it aloud, not quite sure of the meaning of the last word. Then she asked if it was okay. I said that the grammar was correct and it was a valid concern.

I love my job.

IOU: belated sports day

Sports day was about a month ago--sorry for the delay. Lesson planning and long hours with the ESS have made me an absentee. Furthermore, this post has been somewhat of a blockage, as the highlight of the sports festival was the students and their performances and it's illegal and unethical for me to have students in public photos. However, I think that the spirit of the event can best be shown through the mascots, the giant murals each group of students painted and erected by the bleachers where they cheered.

黄色組　Yellow Team, "Merry Du'Emperor"


赤組 Red Team, "Sol Big Bang"


青組 Blue Team, "Marin Joker"


緑組 Green Team, "Balmy Fantasia"


These were entirely student-designed and reproduced on a 20 by 30 foot scale.

In addition to this, the students also worked on cheering costumes (think kimono meets pirate), cheering routines, dance routines, and a play. This is all in addition to the sports, which really were just an excuse to have a party and do a lot of art. The costumes, incidentally, were awesome. Not just cool awesome--awe-inspiring awesome. Girls wore knee-length pirate-ish dresses made of taffetta, chiffon, and Japanese print fabric. They had their hair and makeup done with care to rival most girls at my prom. Boys were equally piratically inclined with trousers, white shirts, and colored vests, unless they were team leaders. If they were team leaders, they had elaborate long coats, also made from some shiny material and some Japanese-print fabric. To see groups of these students taking the dusty field at a slow saunter was to see bad-ass personified.

And then they played tug of war and far more vicious games in these outfits in 95 degree heat. If they didn't play (and even if they did), they danced and did super-elaborate cheering routines to pop songs played by the brass band. The energy was insane.

At the end, the third-year group leaders stormed the podium and tossed the principal into the air.

At the very end, the students gathered in groups for pictures and tearful speeches. My school is a high academic school, so sports day is literally all the creative fun crazy time most of these students have. For the third years, it's their last chance to experience high school before they disappear under piles of practice examinations.

There's no equivalent in American high schools--there just isn't. The context is so different and the way it's planned and done--the sheer teamwork of it--just wouldn't happen. It wasn't about sports, but about the spirit of being a part of team, whether that team runs a relay, does a dance, or makes an amazing mural.

And I totally understand why the students were so sad when it was over.